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Cavan: The Wild West of Eire

DS86DS

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You'd have to feel sorry for the wife. She spends half an hour preparing Val's dinner every day....only to not even get a thank you for her efforts, just Val blowing off for the rest of the night while he's giving out about the news.
 

Mowl

Member
You'd have to feel sorry for the wife. She spends half an hour preparing Val's dinner every day....only to not even get a thank you for her efforts, just Val blowing off for the rest of the night while he's giving out about the news.

The fat cunt just shovels her cuisine down his fat neck while mouth-breathing and moaning about the latest posts I made on his crappy youtube ego-fest. She'd be better off shagging Blue Mickey.

Pink Mickey's fucking useless in the sack AND he smells of shite.
 

Mowl

Member
Val: 'Honeybuns - there's no toilet paper in here - can you bring me some?'

Herself: 'No. Fuck off. You smelly fucking pig..'

Val: 'Ah, sure fuck it - I'll use a rat so..'
 

DS86DS

Member
Administrator
The poor rat. Though at least he could give Val a good bite in the arse with those sharp rodent teeth.
 

DS86DS

Member
Administrator
Well I suppose for the rat it's a case of biting first before Val gets the chance to bite him.
 
'Cavan On My Mind' would be a good album title for Irish Country & Western music, if I may be so bold as to call it music, and I suppose I must. Not for me to decide what is music or not.

Cavan. Maybe it is a state of mind rather than a place which is why I can't picture it. Like a sort of Waterford without the excitement factor.
 

Mowl

Member
'Cavan On My Mind' would be a good album title for Irish Country & Western music, if I may be so bold as to call it music, and I suppose I must. Not for me to decide what is music or not.

Cavan. Maybe it is a state of mind rather than a place which is why I can't picture it. Like a sort of Waterford without the excitement factor.

The only thing that rhymes with Cavan is Navan - and wavin - the pipes that take your shit out into the sea. They were also used by U2 as a backdrop in their early gigs, like this one from their support slot with The Police at Leixlip (which I attended - my eldest sister took me with her gang):



But palindromes can be tricky little fuckers.

 

Mowl

Member
That fucking mutant is adding videos to his channel several times a day.

His neighbours really shouldn't be encouraging him.

He'll have to take every single video down eventually - I'll see to that.


 
He should combine the two and hit himself on the hand with the hammer rhythmically while swearing using alliteration and assonance.

If he doesn't fancy that he can make some tea and toast and stare out the window.
 

Mowl

Member
Val has tried his hand at poetry and engineering recently. What next... Impressionist art perhaps?

Small penis syndrome: he to try to outdo every other male in the vicinity at anything they can do.

This included 'The Scratching Song' - the most embarrassing four minutes of Irishness ever.

He should combine the two and hit himself on the hand with the hammer rhythmically while swearing using alliteration and assonance.

Those words are far to big for Val to read, never mind understand.

If he doesn't fancy that he can make some tea and toast and stare out the window.

Which is exactly what he does most days, the only detail missing is him having his little willy in hand.

Val's penis is so small he makes Japanese men appear well endowed.
 

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